The freckle

There they were, the after effects of a day in the sun! Aaaaaargh, don’t they make you regret a day basking in the sun?!?  Make you regret enduring an hour long trip by bus (which you were actually looking forward to) to the beach, regret not applying any sunscreen, regret not bathing with a t-shirt on irrespective of what others say?  Yes, they made me, only after I ended up with blisters all over my back and face. Too late now isn’t it?!

Well, this happened more than once but this time in particular, one week after I was still scratching off dead tissue just where I had a big blister at the top of my left cheek just below the corner of my eye.  After some time the area healed but I was left with an ugly brownish freckle…..or was it?

A couple of visits to the dermatologist resulted in the applications of creams to no avail.  The stubborn freckle was to stay.  On the fourth visit I noticed a young dermatologist suggesting something to the consultant with let’s-try-this-to-make-sure-we-exhausted-all-the-options-at-hand look on his face.  I was too young to suspect anything.

That day I had later been subjected to a different treatment, Cryosurgery.  They tried freezing the freckle to death using liquid nitrogen!  Ha, there you go bitch!!  The young dermatologist approached me with a flask like aluminum bottle out of which a crooked nozzle sprang out of the top.  It resembled something out of a horror movie 🙂  He had applied the end of it close to the skin surface just above the freckle.  When he pulled the trigger (?) the sound it emitted was similar to that of an amplified shaving foam bottle.  Too bad I wasn’t informed that the stinging would be something close to a 100 bee stings altogether.  I winced for a couple of minutes.  It seemed to me then that Dr. Heim was actually liking it.  I relaxed……or rather, I would like to believe that I relaxed, and he stopped torturing me!  It wasn’t fun any more so probably he figured out that he could stop this!

Well. it worked!……..only for the pigmentation to come back a few days later…..and 14 years later, it’s still there.  This was 1992 and I was 12 years old, not a good time to mess with someone’s looks!  Although very much aware of it, I eventually got used to it. The advice given recurrently was simple: “Apply loads of sunscreen and stay out of the sun.” Did they suspect Lupus back then?  There’s no way of knowing.  All I know is that at the time I hated anyone who counseled me so.  How could a twelve year old outdoors person stay out of the sun?  Well, I didn’t take much heed of that advise but as I grew older (and I hope, a bit wiser) I started using some sunscreen and trying to avoid the sun.  I admit that I still like to soak a couple of rays up especially on cold Winter days when I’m in pain.  Too bad that on cold days I wish for warmer ones when my hands don’t ache so much but then warmer days are the sunny ones and I have to stay out of the sun!  Why?  Photosensitivity is known to trigger Lupus symptoms that can range from skin rashes to systemic flare ups which can damage internal organs.  What a bugger!  Anyways, no more patches of pigmentation developed over the years maybe because I eventually started taking more care.  Having said this, I have to admit that I do not follow all this advise here, but I am working on more self compliance!

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